Grow Your Own Famiglia
by glomp-meister
Summary: Suppose Reborn was not a baby but a fish and suppose Tsuna was not just no good, he really was worst in the world, and while you're at that, add in the stars and symbols of the western zodiac. What do you get? Your self grown family.
1. INTRODUCING GEMINI!

No, I do not own Kateikyoushi Hitman Reborn! or any related merchaindise :D

**Grow Your Own – Tsunayoshi Sawada & Crew**

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Once upon a time, there lived a young boy named Sawada Tsunayoshi. He had big brown eyes and a tuft of hair that could not be tamed, no matter how hard he tried. He lived with his mother and his papa was hardly ever home due to his job as an advisor for an Italian noble.

But Tsuna could deal with it; after all, he had his gigantic fish to keep him company. A big sunfish, along with its tank filled up half of Tsuna's bedroom. He named the fish Reborn, since the fish came from the wild and was given a new home in Tsuna's own house. He was 'reborn' in his home.

There was something about Reborn that Tsuna had never told anyone about though. Reborn was not just your normal sunfish. No. No, he was a fairy mermaid fish thing. At night, Reborn would turn into a man with weird mer-legs and criticize Tsuna harshly, but that was alright. Because Reborn was family.

And as much as you might be fascinated with a sunfish turned man, this is not a story focusing on his unfortunate, perhaps fortunate, curse. This is a story about how our own little Sawada Tsunayoshi faced the odds of growing his own…

**Death.**

Oh, sorry about that, I had meant family. Yes, family.

You see, although Tsuna never really showed it, he was very lonesome. When he went to school, Reborn was not there, nor was his mother. And the other children at school would poke at him and call him names. Tsuna never tried to stop it or stand up for himself, after all, what can you do? It was routine, since junior kindergarten.

And this is where our story starts.

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_Ring, ring._

"Class dismissed!" the teacher nodded at the students and opened the door, signaling them to leave.

Although everyone was moving to get out, Tsuna did not move. He did not want to see those bullies. But alas, the teacher snapped her ruler on his desk, jolting him back to reality.

"Sawada, didn't you hear me? It's time to leave."

He did not want to face them. He really hated to. And now, he had to.

"Ah, yes! I'm terribly sorry for inconveniencing you." he nodded his head and left quickly.

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Tsuna poked his head out the doors of the school, phew! Those bullies must have gotten tired of waiting for him. He felt sorry for those who they found to be their newest victim.

Tsuna started inching out of the school before he froze. He heard them. Had they seen him?

"Tch. That no good loser isn't here! But at least we got you, beautiful." Tsuna looked a little further to the left and he saw them.

The bullies and a girl. She had dark blue hair and it looked like she had a black eye from far away. They were surrounding her. _He wanted to help, but what could no good Tsuna do?_

"So sweetheart, wanna play?" he saw one of those filthy thugs grab her arm, twisting it behind her.

The girl looked like a rag doll and Tsuna could not just stand by and watch anymore. He had to take action, Reborn would surely be proud of him then… or not.

Tsuna rushed over and held the bully's hand tightly, "Hey! That's not nice! Let go of her!"

It happened so fast, Tsuna did not know what was going on, but he sure felt it the next morning. He only remembered being used as a personal punching bag and then the girl who seemed so fragile pulled a punch on the oafs.

A right hook that made them fall like dominoes. All three of those big muscular brutes. All it took was one punch. Admiration filled Tsuna.

His mouth fell open, "Wow! You're so strong!"

Tsuna's chatter abruptly stopped when he realized that the girl had two lynx ears and a small bunny like tail behind her.

"You smell like that mer-boy. That annoying sunfish." the girl gave Tsuna a once over before nodding, "My name is Lal Mirch and I'm the same as your guardian. But since that lazy bum couldn't be bothered to carry your first kitten, here you go." she shoved a package in Tsuna's hands.

It was a purple egg covered in some typical plastic figurine case, with instructions of what to do with it, "Eh? What? Y-You can't be serious…" he trailed off.

"It's alright if you don't get it, Maggot Number Two. Just follow the instructions and you'll be fine."

Tsuna shook his head, he did not want to get involved in anything, "I'm sorry, I cannot accept this, please leave me alone!" he turned to run away but the girl stopped him.

"Shh. You hear that?" Tsuna strained his ears and heard a call.

Someone was calling out a name.

"I gotta go, maggot. If you have any questions, just ask the Sunfish. My maggot is here." with that, Lal Mirch somehow turned into a small bluish black cat and sauntered towards a tall blonde man who had just turned the corner.

_Someway or another, Tsuna was once again roped into something that he desperately did not want to be part of._

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"Reborn!" Tsuna slammed his hands onto the glass panels of the fish tank, "What is this?" he held up the purple egg to the mer-hitman.

His mother was out tonight, catching up with old friends and would be coming back in two days. That meant that Tsuna only had two days to clean up this mess.

The sultry brunette smirked, swimming to the top of the fish tank and propping his elbows up, "It seems like you've finally got your first companion."

"My what?"

"Didn't you read the instructions? My, my, you really are no good. A _femme fatale_, aren't you?" the older man chuckled, running his hand through his spiked locks before stretching one of his ridiculously curly sideburns.

"I didn't get delivered to you out of pure luck and coincidence, Tsuna." Reborn gave the boy a fixed stare, "As you know, I am not human. I'm what you humans would refer to as a Guardian Angel, or a Godfather Fairy."

Tsuna did not miss a beat, "What the heck's a Godfather Fairy?"

"We are only sent out to the most desperate of humans and among the six billion and something people would there; you ranked the highest for loneliness, Dame Tsuna. You ranked the first for the want of companionship. I had suggested that we just send you a dog and get on with it, but apparently, you're allergic to fur. So I was sent instead of that annoying Skull."

Tsuna blinked, "Skull? And I'm not that desperate!"

Reborn hid a small smile that was playing on his lips; at least the boy had enough pride to deny it, "I won't be here with you forever, Tsuna. Once you've collected all your companions, those eggs, I'll leave. I have other children and adults to help. You'll forget all about me and ten years after, I'll have to drop in and make sure you're doing well."

"Eh? Reborn will leave?" Tsuna was really no good; he felt the stinging of his eyes and the blurriness happing fast.

The man sighed and scooped up some gravel from the bottom of the tank, hurling it at the boy, "Don't be stupid. You won't need me then. My job is done once you are actually happy. I ought to be helping children who actually need help, those who need freshwater or those who need to escape from their factories."

Pause, "Anyway, read over the instructions and do as you're told with that egg. I'm going to sleep." with that, the fish swam back into the depths of the water, leaving Tsuna alone with his miseries.

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Tsuna sighed as he read the instructions and carefully placed the egg into the bathtub filled with water, "Wait eight hours." he mumbled.

_And boy oh boy, was he going to get a surprise in the morning._

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Tsuna's eyes snapped open; he had just heard a crash. What on earth could that be? But Tsuna was really tired, could it not wait?

**CRASH!**

On second though, _no_.

Brandishing a broom he had found, Tsuna armed himself to go down the stairs and into the kitchen, where he saw a very peculiar sight.

There was a cute girl with violet locks, an eye patch over one eye and wolf ears and a bushy tail. She was wearing something akin to a school uniform. There was another one though. One that so ever so vulgar and tasteless.

The naked man was reaching leaning down to kiss the girl, long azure hair pooled over his shoulders, part of it pinned up to form some kind of pineapple hairstyle. He also had the animalistic features to him. One vermillion eye and one sapphire.

Tsuna screamed.

Before promptly fainting in what was now enemy territory.

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:D So? whaddaya think? i really hope thi won't turn out to be as much of a fail as my other one... XD

R&R PLEASE! :D


	2. STILL NAKED?

Disclaimer: Don't own!

P.S PLEASE VISIT MY POLL

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"Mukuro-sama, is he awake?" Tsuna could make out a soft voice in the background.

"I don't know, my dear Chrome. Maybe a kiss from a prince would wake him up, don't you agree, sweetheart?" a man's voice this time, deep and suave sounding.

_Wait, could someone even sound suave?_

"Mukuro-sama!" a shriek.

Tsuna could feel hot breath blowing over his face and on any other day, he might have thought that he had left the window open and it was drizzling outside. Unfortunately though, he remembered what had happened and what he had seen before he seemed to pass out.

Two wolf people.

_One male_, one female.

_One naked_, one clothed.

One decent and normal, _the other a pervert_.

Needless to say, his eyes snapped open in fear, disgust, and shock, "Don't come any closer!" Tsuna crab crawled to the corner of the room, his back slammed against the drywall.

He eyed the two foreigners warily. A girl was standing behind the man, her hands held behind her back. The man was still naked much to anyone's guess but had the decency to use a cushion to block unsightly views. Though he probably thought that as the eighth wonder of the world.

_Tsuna did not think so_.

"Oya, oya, let me explain myself, cutie." the man smirked, inching closer to Tsuna, the cushion dropping slightly.

_And ever so slowly_.

"Mukuro-sama!" the eye patch pulled him back and gave Tsuna an apologetic glance, "I'm sorry, sir. My name is Chrome and this is Mukuro, we're married. We are your first companions, Gemini."

"Gemini?"

The man named Mukuro sighed and turned to his female counterpart, "My dearest Chrome, it seems like the little kitten knows naught of us."

Chrome twitched before pointing up the stairs, her lips tightened into a straight line. Without a word, the man marched upstairs like a child banished to timeout.

"Your name is Tsunayoshi Sawada, correct?" her voice was rather sweet and upon closer inspection, t'was naught a girl but a woman.

"_Yes?_"

"As you were probably told before, you have ranked number one in the world for the factor, loneliness." she paused, "For every person who ranks the highest for a depressing factor, they are sent their needed signs."

"Signs? You mean Aries, Leo, Capricorn and others?" Tsuna asked disbelievingly.

"That's correct. For you, Gemini was sent first, due to your lack of companionship. I believe that Taurus is coming next…" she paused.

"Mukuro-sama! Come back down." the man stalked down the stairs, a pour prominent on his lips. A glare was thrown towards Tsuna; no doubt Mukuro was blaming him for the scolding from his wife.

"Ryo-kun is coming next right? Because Tsunayoshi needs some brightening up in his life?" she asked her husband, the cute girlish attitude all around her one again.

Mukuro shrugged, "Sorry, I don't know. But it's either him or that octopus."

"Gokudera-kun?"

"Ya. Anyhow, my cute Tsunayoshi-sama, where are your clothes?" the still naked man came closer, cupping Tsuna's chin in his hands, his breath on the boy's face.

_Hmmm. Minty_.

Tsuna screamed, wanting to appease his current predator, "They won't fit you! Try Reborn's!"

Pineapple man cocked his head slightly, "Who?"

"Reborn, Mukuro-sama. You know; the sunfish fairy godfather." Chrome had taken it upon herself to explore her new domain, namely, Tsuna's house.

"Oh. Be right back, honey," pause, "And wait for me, Tsunayoshi-kun, we'll finish what we started in a couple minutes."

Tsuna's mouth fell agape, this was really too much to handle. First there was Sunfish Reborn, then Lynx Lal-Mirch, and then Chrome, then that pervert. Who, mind you, was still naked and proudly parading around the house, seemingly innocent was he did so. _Which was quite the feat in itself._

"I suggest you hide or go over to a friends' house." Chrome smiled, "He's really going to finish what he started. And since I need to go buy some clothes to fit him, I can't help you, Boss."

"Eh?" the woman had his wallet in hand and was counting his meager allowance in sets of five.

_Move Tsuna move!_ But he sat still, at least until Chrome had left with his wallet and anything else in there. _All his savings… gone._

_And who the heck is Boss?_

Tsuna yelped as a crushing weight was slammed onto his chest, "I'm back, Tsunayoshi-kun!" Mukuro sang, his red eye glinting with malicious intent. _Still naked though._

"It's time to play, sweetheart. You won't get of easily for making my dear Chrome mad at me, understand? _Now, strip for me_." oh that was it, Tsuna bolted, forgetting his shoes and running to his neighbors.

Speaking of which, they had peculiar people with animalistic features in their houses too. Maybe he could get help from one of them?

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IT'S YOUR TIME TO REVIEW OR PM ME!!!! I NEED TO KNOW WHO WILL THE NEIGHBOUR BE!!! IT'S BETWEEN DINO AND XANXUS, PLZ CHOOSE ONE.

PLEASE R&R 3 THANK YOU TO THE EXTREME!!!

P.S PLEASE VISIT MY POLL

Thank you to all the ppl who read this :D


	3. BE A GOOD NEIGHBOUR!

Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue.

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Tsuna rang the doorbell, looking extremely on the edge. He waited a couple seconds, still no answer, "Where are you, Dino?" he murmured.

Then he realized it. There, on the bench mat inside the storm door, a note lay undisturbed.

It read; _I'm sorry if I'm not here at the moment Tsuna, but I thought that Romario and the boys needed to take a walk outside. I am a professional dog trainer after all; besides, I heard that my range is not faring so well, so I'll be checking that out for the remainder of the month._

Tsuna bolted to his other neighbor's house.

"Xanxus! Open the door, Xanxus! I've got a pervert on my trail!" Tsuna banged on his neighbor's door, looking back to check on the pervert radar.

No one for now. Thank goodness.

"_Xanxus!_" Tsuna screamed, "Open the door! Where are you!" the door opened and the boy toppled in.

"What is it trash?" Tsuna peered up from the floor that his face seemed so accustomed to.

He squeaked when he saw the two red eyes looking back at him, "Oh, Xanxus! I didn't know that you would be here…" he trailed off.

"Then why exactly did you go ballistic in front of my house, trash? I have my stupid fish, mink, frog, peacock, robot, and shrine boy to feed, make it quick." Xanxus sighed; it wasn't as if he hated Tsuna.

_It was just that he was a bit burdening with his… trashiness._

"Um, well, you see, I thought that, maybe, it would be a good idea to, kinda, talk to you about, you know," Tsuna fidgeted under the older male's gaze.

Xanxus frowned, "You can stay over for the next two days, until your mother comes home. I still have to pay her back for that pasta she made."

"Eh? How did you know?"

"There's been a _pineapple person_ stuck to my window the minute you've arrived. A naked pineapple person and tell him that I'm going to rip off that stupid tail and ears of his if he doesn't get his greasy, oily, grubby fingers off of my windows."

He continued, "I just had that shark trash wipe them for me."

"T-Thank you, Xanxus!" Tsuna raced into the living room, admiring his neighbor's sense of interior design. It was definitely better than Dino's.

After all, the dog walker had urine stains among other stains on his walls and furniture. One of the stains which resembled blood very well. Tsuna could recall that the story of the stain went something along the lines of:

Dino walked into his house.

Dino tripped.

Dino fell.

Dino bled.

Dino got a concussion.

Xanxus came in.

Xanxus decided to search Dino's pockets for some bills.

Xanxus found a stack of six hundred. Xanxus took the money.

Xanxus called in a silver haired man to help search the drawers in the house for any left over money.

Said silver haired man flopped into the house, his dorsal fin wriggling behind him.

Xanxus and man ransacked poor Dino's house.

Before leaving, Xanxus gave one sound kick to Dino's head and his fair saying of, "I'm borrowing a couple thousand, trash. _Good to know that you approve._"

Xanxus left, the other man had stayed.

The silver haired man said… _no, he had screamed_, Tsuna heard it from his flashlight sniping high peak corner of his house, "_VOIII WHERE ARE YOUR FUCKING DOGS? THEY STOLE MY LUNCH THE OTHER DAY! FUCKING DOBERMANS!_"

Ahh, what a nice flashback Tsuna had.

"What!" Tsuna squeaked, "That wasn't a nice flashback at all!"

"Shut up trash." Xanxus growled, "If I said it, then it's a damn good flashback, ya hear me, you lump of trash?"

Tsuna nodded his head quickly, "I actually wanted to talk to you about the weird people in Dino's, yours and my residences respectively."

Xanxus poured himself some dark whiskey before answering, "Don't bother asking that fucking horse trash. He won't remember anything. I still do though."

He dealt Tsuna a harsh glare, "So listen close, 'cause I'm not going to repeat this again, alright?"

Tsuna gulped, "_Affirmative._"

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ALRIGHT!!! PLEASE REVIEW!!! AND PLEASE CHECK OUT MY POLL!!!!!

btw it was

3 - Dino & 5 - Xanxus

NEXT TIME : THE VARIA CIRCUS WILL BEGIN!!!


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